Shrimp Salsa Soup

Hello my little puppies. It's been far too long and far too busy for me recently.  I feel like I should come up with some awesome short post of food to cook. I came up with the concept after going to a Mexican restaurant with my ex forever ago.

Cold Shrimp Salsa Soup

1/2 cup of Shrimp (usually tiny ones)
1/4 cup of Catalina Dressing
1/4 cup of tomato juice
1/4 cup of diced tomatoes
1/4 cup diced red peppers
1/4 cup finely diced onion
1/4 cup diced avocado
3 Tbsp Shrimp Cocktail sauce
Salt to taste
Lime Juice to taste

Saltine Crackers for scooping it up and eating it with.

Soak the shrimp in water filled with a little lime juice and then take them out and squeeze them. Mix everything together and enjoy! It's best to eat it fresh, but it can keep for a little while

GO EAT SOME SCRMIPS NOW!!

Love,
Me

Brussels Sprouts....not Brussel Sprouts

I am sad that I haven't kept up with this blog much, but whateverbugbutterputter... I decided to make brussels sprouts since I bought a small bag at trader joes. 

Leeks and Brussels sprouts in a White Wine Sauce

1 clove garlic

1 leek chopped and de sanded

30 medium Brussels sprouts (preferably halved)

Salt and pepper to taste.

¼ cup white wine

1 tsp Italian seasonings or a mix of Mediterranean herbs

Dash of celery salt

2 Tbsp freshly toasted almond slivers

½ Tbsp apple cider vinegar (optional)

Several Sundried tomatoes for taste (optional)

1 Tbsp fresh parmesan cheese (add in last)

Sautee leeks and garlic for 10 minutes in olive oil.  Add in the rest of the ingredients (except cheese) and simmer everything for 25’35 minutes whilst stirring.  Since it simmers a while…it is a fairly bitter dish…

You can adjust the recipe  as you feel appropriate.  Just remember, if you are making a white wine sauce with brussels sprouts, then you want to keep the number of flavors as low as possible.  I suggest some oregano and rosemary or something.  But, often times I use Herbes du Provence or Italian pasta mix.  Also, if you add in the tomatoes and vinegar, it will be pretty sour, so it's not necessary to add them in.  Be sure all the alcohol cooks out...because it's not a good taste with fresh vegis.

Thanks for your time my little unicron burbies!

Love,

Auntie Kyle

Hot as Hell, Cold as Ice

Today I decided to make something to drink....why you  ask? Because it was hot as hell, so I needed something as cold as ice to cool down. It was 102 degrees outside and felt like the surface of the sun.  Actually there was a fire in our neighborhood and they had to contain it.  We're all going to dry out and die.  But on a lighter note...I came up with two wonderful recipes perfect for summer!

Jasmine Sun Tea

3 Jasmine teabags or 1 big teabag
1 pitcher
3/4 - 1 cups of sugar
water
Saran wrap (or however you spell it)
 OPTIONAL:
Juice from 1 lemon
substitute in some honey for 1/3 of the sugar

Basically when it's scalding hot outside and there is sunlight constantly hitting a spot, take a CLEAR GLASS pitcher (because it doesn't mess up taste) and fill it up with water.  Put in the teabags and cover for about 5 hours or until it turns green-teaish-colored. Then add in the sugar and dissolve it and put into the fridge.  It....is....wonderful.....so do it...

Watermelon Juice

Watermelon Slices (the less cucumber-tasting and the more candy-tasting watermelons are the best)
3/4 - 1 cup of sugar
Juice from 2 limes
Water
An Old T-Shirt or old cloth napkin (something sturdy and cloth)
OPTIONAL:
Rose water to taste (because flowers are kind of my thing)

Take the pieces of watermelon when they are chilled and empty them into a pitcher by squeezing them dry through the shirt/napkin/etc.  In the end you should fill up a pitcher with some beautiful pink juice to the 1/5 mark. Fill the rest up with water and add in the sugar and lime.  Mix well and chill.  It also tastes pretty good with watermelon or other fruit vodkas if you want mixed drinks! Feel free to skim of the gross melon scum. Also...I feel like this would be pretty good with honeydew also.

Sorry if I don't post to often, but y'all have a wonderful time trying this! It is a great counterpart to my Mint Lemon-Limeaide from last year! I will try to post more stuff. I think my next post may be something crazy and new.

Your's Truly,
Kyle

cHIPotle Sauce

So in my town there is a restaurant called Choochoo and they, when I used to work there, they started making tacos that were a fusion of Korean and Mexican...since all the cooks are Mexicans and stuff. Well anyway, by asking around, using basic deductive skills, and experimenting I figured out how to make my own chipotle sauce. It may be a bit too spicy for you, so if you'd like you can mix it with ranch.  It makes a marvelous salad dressing, sauce for tacos, or marinade for many different things.

Chipotle Sauce

1 little little can of chipolte peppers in adobo sauce
1 normal can of peaches with syrup
1 full bottle of thousand island dressing

1 fine mesh sieve

Blend all the ingredients together for about 1 minute to combine well. Next, in order to get rid of gross pieces, strain through a fine mesh sieve very well. Then put back in the bottle (and probably little containers).

ENJOY!!!
KYLIE!!!!

Death Ulcer Tea

So....I got a mouth ulcer....and then it turned into 5.....then I had to talk on the phone for 6 hours nonstop until they turned into bruises and felt like a bloody hell.  I tried using orajel which uses hydrogen peroxide...it worked pretty well...but I found a type of tea specifically medicinal. So I thought I would write down the recipe.  Sage is an antiseptic along with cardamom, and clove is a natural numbing agent.

Mouth Ulcer Tea

3 coffee filters stacked up
1/2 tsp sage
1/4 tsp clove
1/4 tsp cardamom
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1 Tbsp Green tea
2 Tbsp raw sugar

Basically strain the items in a cup by pouring hot water over them...then Squeeze it really well to get all the good chemicals out. It also makes a pretty good tea in general.

Drink and enjoy!

KIMCHI JIGAE!!!

Okay...so not many people are fans of Kimchi...which I can understand.  But, When I worked at Choochoo we came up with a kimchi taco and it was disgusting.  Most people hate pickles or are just scared of the super garlic smell that it puts off.  But still...it's very savory and good for you.  I recently decided to make Kimchi Jjigae, which is a Korean soup made using kimchi.  I liked it and used some of my Homemade

Kimchi Jjigae

1 cup kimchi chopped into small pieces

2 cups pork broth or water

7 slices of pork jowels, bacon, or bork belly sliced into small pieces

½-¼ an onion julienned and sauteed

3-10 mushrooms sliced thin and sauteed

1 tsp sesame oil

1 tsp gochujaang

1 tsp Chinese soybean paste

1 tsp salt

Rice, corn, wheat, or buckwheat noodles chopped short

8 ounces cubed firm or extra firm tofu raw or sauteed

Basically just cover the bottom of the pot with the pork and cook it until it renders.  Next add in the onion and mushrooms and cook them until they sweat.  Then add in the tofu and kimchi.  Stir to combine well being careful not to break the tofu cubes.  Then add in the water and spices and cook for about 20-45 minutes (just right for tofu). 

Boil the noodles in another pot with some gochujaang and then drain them when they are barely undercooked.  Then strain and combine carefully in the soup.  Lastly cook another 10 minutes and serve hot!

It's really not too spicy and really yummy!

Also...I lost my camera...so...no pictures....gimme time...

Happy Cooking!

Kylie Swayne

Collards, Collards Everywhere and as soul as Yo Mama.....

I thought I would make this Collards recipe because I for some reason decided to attempt collard greens after eating at the Pope house for Christmas.  They made soul food because their mom is a Soul goddess from the south who knows how to make amazing fried chicken...better than mine could ever be.  So I'm kinda pleased with my recipe...not gonna lie...

Kyle’s BBQ Bacon Collard Greens

1 Head of collard greens (like 20-30 leaves??) chopped into ½” x 4” pieces

½ onion diced or julienned

4 pieces of bacon chopped into fine pieces

¼ cup BBQ small pork pieces

2 cups water

2 Tbsp lard, bacon grease, or butter

1 tsp salt

2-5 tsp of chicken bouillon powder or to taste

1 tsp curry powder

½ tsp black pepper

¼ tsp nutmeg

Cook in a crock pot, stirring every hour to 30 minutes, for about 4-6 hours.  Serve hot.  You can cook as long as you want just as long as the leaves don't fall apart.  Soul food is known for cooking a long time. 

And if you have leftover chicken breast or tenders try this.

Soul Taco

Halved Onion Pita bread

Kyle's BBQ Bacon Collards

Handful of Italian 5 cheeses

slices of grilled or baked chicken breast/tenders

Warm everything up and put it in a warm onion pita.  It's AMAZING!! 

Happy Cooking!

Kyle Swayne