SHOOT IT!! SHOOT IT!!

So today I had a very tiring day...it was friday and I just wanted to go home...not to watch the game but do gay stuff...like lay around the house being gay and stuff...what evs..basically what I do everyday. But that's not the food part...

I made my first successful English biscuit recipe last night. First I had to make the dough...quite the endeavor...I had to balance it out perfectly...just enough fat...just enough water...and just the right leavening agents. Well....maybe it wasn't that hard...just time-consuming.

Here's the recipe for the biscuits:

1 ¾ cups cake flour
½ tsp salt
2 tsp baking powder
¾ cup sugar
2 tsp starch (potato)
4 Tbsp shortening
2 Tbsp soy flour
2 tsp vanilla
Sprinkle of yeast
1/3 cup warm milk
1 Egg


First I had to mix up the dough and form it into a ball. I decided to use cake flour because it has the least amount of gluten, meaning that it is lighter, crisper, and fluffier.

After that I floured the surface and the ball and rolled it out to about half a centimeter thick. I used a plain cookie cutter and cut little circles for the biscuits. Then I had to prick holes in it. This serves many different purposes.  It keeps the biscuits from forming into domed cake shapes, it helps them dry out and circulate air better, and it makes them look cool.

Next I cooked them in a 275 degree Fahrenheit oven on a pizza stone that had been warmed up. The cooking process involved me cooking them 12 minutes on both sides and them putting them on a cooling rack for a while before cooking them again to remove the rest of the water. Toast under a broiler on both sides for about 1-2 minutes until almost golden brown.

After that I placed the cooling rack in the oven for about 20 minutes to dry the biscuits out the rest of the way.
They were yummy and thought about substituting in some cream or coconut milk into the milk mixture. It would have been really good.

In addition to cooking biscuits (at 2 am again) I also went to someone's house today where I had petrone for the first time...it's disgusting and has a terrible taste...it tastes like dirty...just straight up dirty and alcohol.  Like if you clean off a table at a restaurant and it's gross...that's petrone.

So I decided to make GOOD shots. Since I cook with my nose and liquor is mainly scent oriented.  I made a couple really good shots....here ya go!


First, the oddly named (not by me) BLUE TACO (actually purple...originally called a purple cow...but was taken)

Blue Taco
1 part blue Curaçao
1 part triple sec
1 part grenadine
1 part pomegranate juice
1 part vodka
1 part pear schnapps


Second the WET BLANKIT (blanket like BLANK IT...because you're probably cursing by this point)

2 part vanilla rum
1 part Amarula cream liquor
2 parts Creme du banana
1 part crown royal whiskey

And, last but not least....CLOROX (because it looks like clorox)

2 Parts melon liquor
2 parts peach schnapps
1 part vodka

Also...Blake made a shot...I called it the Blake Christmas shot! :D

1 part creme de menthe

1 part peach schnapps
1 part triple sec

Suffice it to say....I had an interesting night...but a lot of fun. I hope to hang out with all those guys again. I quite enjoyed myself.  And in addition I got to cook fish and chips for everyone...and I'd like to say...I was just chuffed as chips to make fish and chips because I love my British foods!


Anywho! Good night y'all...I need sleep and water...

Sincerely yours...
Gay for Pizza